We’re getting married but how do we do the legal bit? By Helen Phillips
Getting married isn’t something any of us do every day and many couples navigating ‘the system’ for the first time can find the legal/ formal side of marriage to be a bit of a minefield.
This is where this blog aims to help by giving you a summary of your choices and the steps to take to officially register your marriage. This blog intends to be a general overview, specifics do vary within the U.K and can also depend on the local registration service. There are links at the bottom of this blog to help you find your local register office depending on where you live and, if in doubt, please speak to them directly.
So what do you need to do to register your marriage officially?
Assuming that you want your marriage to be legally binding, as most couples do, it’s important to familiarise yourself with your options and the current marriage law landscape here in the U.K. before committing to anything. Try not to feel pressured, even if a venue insists you book your ceremony before they confirm your date. Read this first then make an informed decision on what is best for you before you proceed and part with any money!
So first things first, it might help to think of the marriage and wedding as two slightly different things.
Marriage: the legally or formally recognised union of two people as partners in a personal relationship
Wedding: a marriage ceremony, especially considered as including the associated celebrations
So a wedding can include the marriage (though it doesn’t have to) and a marriage can be accompanied by a wedding (but again, it doesn’t have to be). This is worth bearing in mind when looking at your options.
To have a legal marriage performed (whether separately from or at the same time as your wedding), your options are:
- A registry office: You go to these council run premises and they perform the marriage ceremony. Prices vary based on the size of the room/ number of guests and whether you just want the basic content or to include readings, a ring exchange etc. You book a specific slot in a specific room and the officiant will be whoever is on duty that day. You can pick any registry office, it doesn’t have to be the one most local to you.
Important note: by law, every registry office must offer a statutory marriage ceremony which is a simple exchange of legal vows with just 2 witnesses (often called a ‘2+2’) and without readings/ music/ rings for around £100. These might be offered once a week or only once a month (usually on Mondays or Tuesdays). They are not always advertised and they can book up quickly so check with wherever you want this to be and plan ahead!
Registry office ceremonies are great for:
Couples who want a no-fuss/ frills ceremony and just want to be married without necessarily wanting an expensive wedding celebration.
Couples who want a city/ town based wedding with celebrations following at a separate location.
Couples who want to legally register their marriage but are having a separate wedding (for example going abroad, having a Celebrant ceremony)
Registry office ceremonies are not so great for:
Couples who want to have more personalisation in their ceremony.
Couples who want to choose the person who officiates their ceremony.
Couples who want all their wedding celebrations in one location.
- Religious building- Your ceremony is conducted by an officiant from that faith. The use of these premises can range from a fee to a ‘suggested donation’ to no charge (usually only if you are a practising and regular attendee). As a rule, all Anglican churches are, by default, permitted to perform legal marriage ceremonies. If you are looking at another branch of Christianity or other religion then it is worth checking first that it is registered as a place of worship and licensed for marriage. You can check on the link below and also ask them directly. You also are well advised to check who they agree to marry especially if you have been married before or are a multifaith or LGBTQ+ couple. Usually you can only marry in religious building that you have a ‘connection’ to (e.g. where you live or where you grew up) though the rules on this can vary.
Religious ceremonies are great for:
Couples who hold a religious faith and want a ceremony that reflects their beliefs.
Couples who want a religious wedding in premises they have a connection to with celebrations most likely following at a separate location.
Couples who already know or have the opportunity to get to know their officiant before the day.
Religious ceremonies are not so great for:
Couples who are not religious and also, sadly still in some cases, couples where one/ both have been married before and also multi-faith and LGBTQ+ couples.
Couples who want all their wedding celebrations in one location or a location different from where they live/ grew up.
Couples who want freedom over the ceremony to put their own personalities into it (and also want their suppliers such as photographers to have freedom within the space).
● Licensed premises with a registrar (e.g hotel)- The registrar comes out to you at your chosen venue. Prices and availability vary by registration service and are usually more for Saturdays and bank holidays than weekdays. You book a specific time slot and the registrar will arrive around 30 minutes beforehand to meet you and introduce themselves. Ceremonies typically last around 20 minutes and need to be punctual as the registrars will usually have another ceremony elsewhere afterwards so if there is significant delay, they may leave without performing the ceremony.
Licensed premises with a registrar are great for:
Couples who want to do everything together in one location/ at the same venue.
Couples who are happy with a simple ceremony without any religious content or significant personalisation (you can choose readings and music as long as it has no religious content).
Couples who are not concerned about meeting or getting to know their officiant beforehand.
Licensed premises with a registrar are not so great for:
Couples who want a slightly longer ceremony or are concerned about running behind schedule/ over the time allocated.
Couples who want to choose and get to know their officiant beforehand.
Couples who want complete freedom over the ceremony to put their own personalities and values into it with significant personalisation and customisation.
● Humanist Ceremonies (Note: only in Scotland, Northern Ireland & the Channel Islands). These are non-religious ceremonies for couples who want a ceremony that aligns to Humanist beliefs and values, conducted by someone (a Humanist Celebrant) who shares those values and beliefs. You can choose your Celebrant and spend time with them beforehand to create a script that is personal and meaningful to you as a couple and reflects what love and marriage means to you specifically.
Important note: in England and Wales, the law differs to Scotland and Northern Ireland and Humanist ceremonies do not currently have legal recognition in England and Wales. In October 2025, the U.K. Government committed to marriage reform which would bring about this legal recognition, however, there are currently no firm timescales for when this will be implemented.
Humanist Ceremonies are great for:
Couples who are non-religious but still want a ceremony that is meaningful and aligned to their values conducted by someone who shares those values.
Couples who want to be able to choose and get to know their officiant beforehand.
Couples who are looking for freedom to hold their ceremony wherever they wish and to not be limited by time.
Not so great for:
Couples who are religious or want to include acts of worship.
Couples who are in England and Wales and want a legal marriage ceremony at the same time as the wedding celebrations (as the law currently stands!)
Couples who want a more traditional wedding that follows a standard, recognisable format.
Whilst Celebrant (Humanist or Civil/ Independent) ceremonies do not currently have recognition in England and Wales, these are another option available to couples particularly those who want to have more personally meaningful content and wish to work with a Celebrant of their choosing with whom they feel a connection or for those who wish to hold a wedding in a location that is not licensed (e.g. a private home, woodland or village hall).
As it stands, if a Celebrant ceremony is chosen in England and Wales, in order to legally register their marriage, a couple will need to choose one of the first three options above. The most common is to opt for the statutory (2+2) ceremony at a registry office, however, couples may choose religious premises (if one of them has a faith and the religion permits this) or may opt to have a registrar come out to their venue on the same day. If choosing the latter, please note some registration services have strict rules on this so please double check with them what these are before making a firm booking.
The official, legal ceremony can take place, before, after or on the same day as the Celebrant ceremony. There is no timescale within which it has to happen (if at all!).
Once you have decided on the location and date of your legal marriage and when you are within 12 months of that, it is important that you give ‘Notice of marriage’. This costs around £50 per person.
This must be done:
- To the local registration services where you live (if you are not sure, then this is where you pay your council tax to/ who collects your bins). This is the case regardless of where your ceremony will actually take place.
- Without exception unless you are getting married in a Church of England Church in which case this will be replaced by ‘reading of the banns’ on the four consecutive Sundays prior to the wedding (you may be encouraged to go along and listen to these but this will depend on your Church and Vicar). This will be arranged by the Church and typically around four months before the wedding date.
- Within twelve months before your marriage (if this lapses, you will have to give notice again) and no later than 29 days before the wedding (although some services may offer a fast-track option for an additional fee).
Important note: If you are intending to get married in a different part of the U.K. to where you live e.g. you live in Northern Ireland and want to marry in England or you live in Wales but want to marry in Scotland, you may be required to give notice in person within the country where you intend to marry rather than/ as well as locally where you live. Please check carefully with the local registration office in the location of your marriage to ensure that you are compliant with their requirements.
I hope that this has been helpful in informing you about your choices and also how to go about legally registering your marriage. You can find out more by following the below links and I am always happy to have a chat and support couples if you want to find out more about Humanist ceremonies and your options.
Helen Phillips- Your Best Life Celebrant
